"Fatigue of Life and Death" Excerpt

"Excerpts from 'Life and Death are Wearing Me Out'"#

I know my ability to endure pain has reached its limit. If I do not yield, I do not know what kind of torture these corrupt officials will use to torment me. But if I yield now, wouldn’t all the tortures I endured be in vain?#

This is just that kid's reckless fabrication. The things he describes in his novel are basically nonsense; do not take them seriously.#

Do you know who Lan Jiefang is? The storyteller—though young, his gaze is shrewd; though not even three feet tall, his words flow like a raging river. Suddenly, Lan Qiansui asked me. I naturally know, I am Lan Jiefang, Lan Lian is my father, Yingchun is my mother. So, you once were a donkey in our family.#

The male dog wags its tail proudly; the man stands tall with pride.#

I have no specific grievances with any of you. If you do not come to fight me, others will come to fight me; this is the era, the misfortune of the wealthy.#

I ran with all my might, gathering all my strength, leaping towards the gap in the high wall created by the summer rain, soaring into the air, my body elongated, flying out of the courtyard wall.#

I understand, Old Black understands.#

"Old Black, breathe deeply, stomp the ground, let the sunlight shine."#

This cow is playing with its belly.#

"If they didn’t force me like this, I might have really given in, but they are torturing me like boiling an eagle; hey, I really won’t give in."#

? I just refuse to accept this; I want to use my actions to test whether what Mao Zedong said counts."#

Although we hope all farmers join the people's commune and take the path of collectivization, individual farmers' insistence on not joining is also a legitimate right. Grassroots organizations must not use coercive orders, nor can they use illegal means to force them to join the commune.#

Though a negative character, he is still more important than those positive mass characters.#

King Wen of Zhou was forced to eat the flesh of his own son, spitting out a few meatballs that turned into rabbits and ran away. The golden dragon swallowing your ear wheel is like a son eating his father's flesh, but he will never spit it out; it will only turn into excrement, and what will that excrement turn into?#

Evil at heart, self-important, filled with hatred for everyone.#

Ximen Jinlong urged me to take the cow into the commune while my father was not home. I disagreed, and he hit me. When he hit me, my cow charged at Hubin. Hubin, in a panic, hid behind my brother. My brother faced the cow, forming a stalemate. A few minutes later, everyone retreated, and thus, nothing happened that day.#

But our county chief wrote about his experiences at the beginning of the "Cultural Revolution" in a humorous and vivid tone. He said he rode a paper donkey, being paraded through eighteen markets in the county, which made his body incredibly strong; his original high blood pressure, insomnia, and other ailments all miraculously healed. He said that whenever he heard the sound of gongs and drums, he would get excited, his legs would tremble, just like that black donkey seeing a female donkey would spring and spray.#

Mandarins and butterflies are all sentiments of the landlord bourgeoisie; the proletariat's aesthetic is the green pine, the red sun, the sea, the mountains, the torch, the sickle, and the axe. If you want to embroider, embroider these things.#

I turned the red tassel spear to stab her; during the revolutionary period, the people's commune had already delegated the power to kill to the village. In Mawan village, thirty-three people were killed in one day and night, the oldest was eighty-eight, the youngest was thirteen, some were beaten to death with sticks, and some were chopped in half with a cleaver.#

During the revolutionary period, the people's commune had already delegated the power to kill to the village. In Mawan village, thirty-three people were killed in one day and night, the oldest was eighty-eight, the youngest was thirteen, some were beaten to death with sticks, and some were chopped in half with a cleaver.#

Wrinkles smooth out, the penis increases day by day, just like a crooked machine gun, horizontal grass, a thousand women like a rolled mat.#

Revolution is not a dinner party; it is violence.#

Buddy, don’t talk like that; it hurts people's feelings. You are still young; when you grow up, you will understand.#

Good daughter, dear daughter, if you can restore your brother Jinlong's military uniform, I will bow to you three times!#

Let father push all the crimes onto Liu Shaoqi, being deceived is innocent, turning against him is meritorious. If you continue to be stubborn and resist to the end, that is like a mantis trying to stop a car, seeking self-destruction. Tell father to parade him for public humiliation; that is the gentlest action. Next, when the masses awaken, I will be powerless.#

Father calmly said: "It is meaningless; I just want to seek peace, to be my own master, and do not want to be controlled by others."#

They want to kill me, and I have no way to resist, but wanting me to die myself is wishful thinking! I want to live well and leave this blemish for all of China!"#

Is this still a cow? This might be a god, or perhaps a Buddha. Is it enduring this pain to enlighten those who are lost and help them awaken? People, do not commit violence against others, nor against cows; do not force others to do what they do not want to do, nor against cows.#

Every pig is a cannonball aimed at the imperialist counter-revolution. So, our old sow gave birth to sixteen piglets, which is actually like giving birth to sixteen cannonballs aimed at the imperialist counter-revolution. Our few old sows are actually aircraft carriers launching a full-scale attack against the imperialist counter-revolution!#

I saw myself running—the future pig king—shining all over, as if wearing close-fitting silk, like a flash of colorful lightning. As I approached the pig king's abode, I leaped up, using my two agile paws, which could forge official seals and counterfeit dollars, to grab the drooping branch of the apricot tree, my body streamlined like a spindle. Using the elasticity of the branch and the inertia of my body, I surpassed the wall and landed in my nest.#

He was extremely ugly, acted strangely, and often said things that were hard to understand; he was a character that everyone hated. Even his own family thought he was a fool. His sister once pointed at his face and asked their mother: "Mother, is he really your son? Did my father pick him up as an abandoned baby while collecting manure early in the morning?" Mo Yan's siblings were all tall and handsome youths, their quality no less than Jinlong, Baofeng, Mutual Aid, and Cooperation. Their mother sighed and said: "When I gave birth to him, your father dreamed of a little ghost dragging a big pen, entering our hall, asking him where he came from. He said he came from the underworld, and once..."#

People in the 1950s were relatively pure; people in the 1960s were extremely fervent; people in the 1970s were quite timid; people in the 1980s were observant of others' expressions; people in the 1990s were extremely evil.#

"Only when the land belongs to us can we become the masters of the land."#

I just like to work alone. All crows in the world are black; why can’t there be a white one? I am a white crow.#

The emperor has no family affairs; the emperor's penis has politics. I should be loyal to my duties and mate with the sows; I must fulfill my responsibilities, injecting my semen into their wombs, regardless of whether they are beautiful or ugly, white or black, whether they are virgin sows or have been mounted by other boars. The complex issue is choice; they are equally urgent and equally intense, which one should I mate with first, or rather, which one should I favor first?#

A pig is a cannonball aimed at the imperialist counter-revolution. I, Little White, as a boar, have a heavy responsibility to gather strength and heed the call to mate with all the sows in the world…”#

This moon is mournful and desolate, specially coming for the deceased Mao Zedong. We see Mao Zedong sitting on the moon—his fat body compressing the moon into an oval shape—draped in a red flag, holding a cigarette between his fingers, slightly tilting his heavy head, with a pensive expression on his face.#

Even brothers must divide their families; how can a group of people with different surnames be forced together?#

"I won’t donate; I worked hard to earn some money; why should I donate it to build a temple?… I ask you to hit me; I hit you a few times back then, so you hit me back a few times. It’s not that I owe you; it’s that you owe me."#

At first, no pig thought this was the prelude to a slaughter.#

At first, no pig thought this was the prelude to a slaughter; they thought it was an autumn outing organized by the Youth League or the labor union of the factory or agency.#

This is a world where silence speaks louder than words; this is an environment where color is less than color. Yes, just treat everything as happening underwater. If he listens to me, he will be a great writer.#

Buddy, you’re back again!#

Son of a bitch, what the hell are you yelling about?!#

Sitting firmly on the sofa, back supported, legs together, propping the "Common Diseases Prevention and Treatment Manual for Livestock" on my knees, reading it with great concentration.#

Training working dogs does not make a dog's nose more sensitive; rather, it teaches the dog how to indicate scents through behavior so that those with less sensitive noses can perceive them with their eyes, such as retrieving a criminal's shoes from a pile of shoes. For the dog, what it retrieves is actually that person's scent, while people see that person's shoes.#

Sometimes I eat with him, sometimes I don’t. I will open the fridge and the freezer. The things in the freezer and the frozen section of the fridge need to be taken out in advance and thawed before eating; otherwise, it’s bad for the teeth. Taking care of your teeth is taking care of your life.#

Damn it, some dogs have become people's pets; some dogs have turned people into pets.#

"You Gao Mi dogs are too barbaric. Our Beijing dogs, when holding a moonlight party, are all adorned with jewels, singing and dancing, everyone dances and discusses art. If we drink, it’s only a little red wine or iced water; if we eat, it’s just a small sausage on a toothpick, eating for fun. Unlike them, look at that black-haired, white-pawed guy—"#

The affairs of the world are like books, being turned page by page. People should look forward and not dwell on historical accounts; dogs should also keep up with the times and face reality.#

I circled around the graves of the Ximen and Bai families three times, then lifted a hind leg and sprinkled a stream of mixed feelings of dog urine on their tombstone.#

To maintain a dog's dignity.#

I want to maintain a dog's dignity.#

Numbers collapse, time becomes fragmented.#

The people need fried dough sticks, just as the people need their mothers.#

It is... the final struggle... unite for tomorrow... the Internationale... must..." A mouthful of blood spurted out, a foot high, splattering onto the surrounding land. His two eyes suddenly brightened, like the light emitted when burning chicken feathers, flickering once, then flickering again, and then dimmed, extinguished forever.#

To the north of the grave of the deceased at the Ximen family, a few dozen meters away, your father stood still, looking around for a while, stamping the ground beneath his feet, and said:#

Old dog, this place belongs to you; I and the moon bear witness for you."#

Relatives and friends do not need to mourn; just find a reed mat, roll me up, and bury me quietly. The grain in my jar, pour it all into the grave, let the grain cover my body and my face. This is the grain produced from my land, and it should return to my land. When I die, no one is allowed to cry; there is nothing to cry about.#

I asked Kaifang to find you all because I wanted to tell you that I don’t have many days left; you don’t need to hide anymore… It was also my confusion; why didn’t I fulfill you back then…”#

That night, Wu Qiuxiang hanged herself on the withered branch leaning southeast on the apricot tree in the courtyard.#

Your father held a cup of wine and poured it towards the moon. The moon trembled, the moonlight suddenly dimmed, as if a layer of mist covered its face. After a moment, the moonlight became bright again, gentler and more desolate. Everything in the courtyard—houses, trees, people, dogs—seemed to be soaked in clear, light blue ink. Your father poured the second cup of wine on the ground. Your father poured the third cup of wine into my mouth.#

When we finally reached that one mu and six tenths of land, which seemed to be made of gold, the moon had already changed color. It first turned a light purple like eggplant flowers, then slowly turned azure blue. At this moment, around us, the moonlight seemed to merge with the azure sea and the vast sky, and we were like tiny creatures at the bottom of this sea.#

Everything that comes from the land will return to the land.#

Is that considered my original creation? No, it is still a clumsy imitation of the classics.#

Our country's writer A Cheng once wrote that love is a chemical reaction. This theory is novel and sounds quite fresh, but if love can be manufactured and controlled chemically, then novelists would have no place to exert their talents. Therefore, even if what he said is the truth, I must oppose it.#

"Fatigue of Life and Death" Excerpt

"Excerpts from 'Life and Death are Wearing Me Out'"#

I know my ability to endure pain has reached its limit. If I do not yield, I do not know what kind of torture these corrupt officials will use to torment me. But if I yield now, wouldn’t all the tortures I endured be in vain?#

This is just that kid's reckless fabrication. The things he describes in his novel are basically nonsense; do not take them seriously.#

The male dog wags its tail proudly; the man stands tall with pride.#

I have no specific grievances with any of you. If you do not come to fight me, others will come to fight me; this is the era, the misfortune of the wealthy.#

I ran with all my might, gathering all my strength, leaping towards the gap in the high wall created by the summer rain, soaring into the air, my body elongated, flying out of the courtyard wall.#

I understand, Old Black understands.#

You two bastards, do not be so arrogant. Everyone should share the food; do not eat alone. Now is the era of communism; what is mine is yours, and what is yours is mine; why should we differentiate?#

"Old Black, breathe deeply, stomp the ground, let the sunlight shine."#

This cow is playing with its belly.#

"If they didn’t force me like this, I might have really given in, but they are torturing me like boiling an eagle; hey, I really won’t give in."#

? I just refuse to accept this; I want to use my actions to test whether what Mao Zedong said counts."#

Although we hope all farmers join the people's commune and take the path of collectivization, individual farmers' insistence on not joining is also a legitimate right. Grassroots organizations must not use coercive orders, nor can they use illegal means to force them to join the commune.#

Though a negative character, he is still more important than those positive mass characters.#

Evil at heart, self-important, filled with hatred for everyone.#

Mandarins and butterflies are all sentiments of the landlord bourgeoisie; the proletariat's aesthetic is the green pine, the red sun, the sea, the mountains, the torch, the sickle, and the axe. If you want to embroider, embroider these things.#

Wrinkles smooth out, the penis increases day by day, just like a crooked machine gun, horizontal grass, a thousand women like a rolled mat.#

Revolution is not a dinner party; it is violence.#

Buddy, don’t talk like that; it hurts people's feelings. You are still young; when you grow up, you will understand.#

Good daughter, dear daughter, if you can restore your brother Jinlong's military uniform, I will bow to you three times!#

Father calmly said: "It is meaningless; I just want to seek peace, to be my own master, and do not want to be controlled by others."#

They want to kill me, and I have no way to resist, but wanting me to die myself is wishful thinking! I want to live well and leave this blemish for all of China!"#

Is this still a cow? This might be a god, or perhaps a Buddha. Is it enduring this pain to enlighten those who are lost and help them awaken? People, do not commit violence against others, nor against cows; do not force others to do what they do not want to do, nor against cows.#

People in the 1950s were relatively pure; people in the 1960s were extremely fervent; people in the 1970s were quite timid; people in the 1980s were observant of others' expressions; people in the 1990s were extremely evil.#

"Only when the land belongs to us can we become the masters of the land."#

I just like to work alone. All crows in the world are black; why can’t there be a white one? I am a white crow.#

A pig is a cannonball aimed at the imperialist counter-revolution. I, Little White, as a boar, have a heavy responsibility to gather strength and heed the call to mate with all the sows in the world…”#

Even brothers must divide their families; how can a group of people with different surnames be forced together?#

"I won’t donate; I worked hard to earn some money; why should I donate it to build a temple?… I ask you to hit me; I hit you a few times back then, so you hit me back a few times. It’s not that I owe you; it’s that you owe me."#

At first, no pig thought this was the prelude to a slaughter.#

At first, no pig thought this was the prelude to a slaughter; they thought it was an autumn outing organized by the Youth League or the labor union of the factory or agency.#

This is a world where silence speaks louder than words; this is an environment where color is less than color. Yes, just treat everything as happening underwater. If he listens to me, he will be a great writer.#

Buddy, you’re back again!#

Son of a bitch, what the hell are you yelling about?!#

Sitting firmly on the sofa, back supported, legs together, propping the "Common Diseases Prevention and Treatment Manual for Livestock" on my knees, reading it with great concentration.#

Damn it, some dogs have become people's pets; some dogs have turned people into pets.#

The affairs of the world are like books, being turned page by page. People should look forward and not dwell on historical accounts; dogs should also keep up with the times and face reality.#

I circled around the graves of the Ximen and Bai families three times, then lifted a hind leg and sprinkled a stream of mixed feelings of dog urine on their tombstone.#

To maintain a dog's dignity.#

I want to maintain a dog's dignity.#

Numbers collapse, time becomes fragmented.#

The people need fried dough sticks, just as the people need their mothers.#

To the north of the grave of the deceased at the Ximen family, a few dozen meters away, your father stood still, looking around for a while, stamping the ground beneath his feet, and said:#

Old dog, this place belongs to you; I and the moon bear witness for you."#

I asked Kaifang to find you all because I wanted to tell you that I don’t have many days left; you don’t need to hide anymore… It was also my confusion; why didn’t I fulfill you back then…”#

That night, Wu Qiuxiang hanged herself on the withered branch leaning southeast on the apricot tree in the courtyard.#

Everything that comes from the land will return to the land.#

Is that considered my original creation? No, it is still a clumsy imitation of the classics.#